A HIGHLAND FLING By Dave McLean
I HAVE BEEN A FRINGE MEMBER OF THE CLUB FOR THE PAST 10 YEARS OR SO, RENEWING MY MEMBERSHIP WHEN I HAD A CAR FIT FOR THE PURPOSE, BUT HAVE BEEN A BIT MORE ACTIVE IN THE LAST 2 YEARS OR SO AND THOUGHT IT WAS TIME TO TRY MY HAND AT WRITING SOMETHING FOR THE MAGAZINE. SO THIS IS MY VERSION OF THE RECENT HIGHLAND WEEKEND, WRITTEN PURELY FROM MY PERSPECTIVE.
IN EARLY JULY, THE DATES WERE ANNOUNCED FOR THE HIGHLAND FLING – AN EVENT THAT TO ME WAS ONLY A LEGEND, BEING HELD ONLY RARELY – AND CERTAINLY NOT ONE TO BE MISSED. I HAD TO GET THE CAR READY TO RUMBLE SO ARRANGED FOR IT TO BE “TIFFED” . FOR THOSE NOT IN THE KNOW THAT BASICALLY INVOLVES LEAVING THE CAR WITH TIFF, WHO WILL SPEND THE NEXT FEW DAYS GIVING THE CAR A GOOD ONCE OVER, AND DOING ALL THAT HE SPOTS, AS WELL AS ANYTHING YOU SPECIFICALLY ASK HIM TO DO. PRIOR TO GIVING THE CAR TO TIFF I HAD ALL SORTS OF NIGGLING PROBLEMS AND BREAKDOWNS AND HAD LOST CONFIDENCE IN THE CAR AND NO LONGER ENJOYED DRIVING IT, TO THE POINT THAT I HAD HARDLY USED IT THIS YEAR.I GOT THE CAR BACK WITH A COUPLE OF WEEKS TO SPARE. IT WAS A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT ANIMAL AND WAS SO RESPONSIVE WHEN ACCELERATING THAT I CONSTANTLY HAD A GRIN ON MY FACE ALL THE WAY HOME. TIFF HAD EVEN WRITTEN A LIST OF THINGS HE HAD DONE, HIS OVERALL OPINION OF THE CAR (IT’S A GOOD ‘UN) AND A LIST OF FUTURE THINGS TO DO.
I HAD TO SORT SOME ACCOMODATION FOR THE TWO NIGHTS I WOULD BE UP NORTH SO I PHONED JUDITH AND IAN THOMSON LOOKING FOR B+B ADVICE, ONLY TO BE TOLD THAT I WAS TO STAY AT THEIR HOUSE, THIS ACT OF GENEROSITY SUMMING UP THE SPIRIT OF THE WEEKEND BEAUTIFULLY, THE ONLY DOWNSIDE BEING THAT I HAD TO SHARE A ROOM WITH THE INFAMOUS EWEN BROWN.
FRIDAY THE 28TH OF JULY FINALLY DAWNED. I PACKED MY BAG, PACKED MY CAR FULL OF TOOLS, AND WROTE DOWN MY AA MEMBERSHIP NUMBER AFTER JOINING THE DAY BEFORE – A PRECAUTION I WOULD NEVER HAVE UNDERTAKEN IN MY YOUNGER YEARS. THE PLAN WAS TO TRAVEL IN CONVOY ON THE WAY FROM THE SCOTTISH CENTRAL BELT UP TO OUR HIGHLAND BASE CAMP OF IAN AND JUDITH’S HOUSE WITH MYSELF MEETING RICHARD JUST BEFORE THE FORTH ROAD BRIDGE AT 5.30PM. AS I HEADED ALONG THE M8 GETTING CLOSER TO THE RENDEVOUS POINT I CONGRATULATED MYSELF ON BEING SO ORGANISED – THE CAR TIFFED, LOTS OF HOPEFULLY NOT NEEDED TOOLS, ALL THE CLOTHES I COULD POSSIBLY NEED, LOTS OF SUNTAN LOTION. IT WAS AS I CAME OFF THE MOTORWAY THAT I REMEMBERED MY ROOF – LOVINGLY CLEANED THE DAY BEFORE AND PLACED AT THE SIDE OF THE GARAGE TO DRY – AND STILL MOST DEFINITELY AT THE SIDE OF THE GARAGE AS I DROVE! A FEW MENTAL SWEAR WORDS LATER AND AT THE POINT OF RETURNING HOME I HAD A RARE EVENT, AN IDEA TO BE PRECISE. TIME FOR A PHONE CALL TO IAN THOMSON TO SEE IF HE HAD A SPARE ROOF IN USEABLE CONDITION. NOT SURE WAS HIS REPLY, PHONE ME BACK AGAIN IN 5 MINUTES. THESE 5 MINUTES SEEMED LIKE AN ETERNITY. I PHONED HIM BACK TO HERE THESE WORDS “NO PROBLEM DAVE, I’VE GOT 3”. RESULT. AT THE RENDEVOUS POINT I MET RICHARD WHO DRIVES A LOVELY METALLIC DARK BLUE GF. AFTER ESTABLISHING THAT WE WERE BOTH HAPPY TO GO AT A SAFE CONSERVATIVE PACE WE HEADED OFF, AND AFTER CROSSING THE BRIDGE I WATCHED RICHARD STEAM UP THE OUTSIDE LANE AND MAKE TOWARDS THE HORIZON – HIS IDEA OF SAFE AND CONSERVATIVE CLEARLY DIFFERENT FROM MINE. I QUICKLY CAUGHT UP AND WE MET LESLEY AND TIFF AT KINROSS SERVICES AT 6PM – THE CONVOY WAS COMPLETE.
WE HEADED OFF WITH TIFF LEADING IN HIS WHITE 1500, RICHARD IN THE MIDDLE AND ME TRAILING BEHIND. WE MADE GOOD TIME, BUT AS WE SWEPT ROUND A FAST FLOWING LEFT HANDER TO JOIN THE A9 JUST NORTH OF PERTH MY ENGINE SPLUTTERED AND DIED. THANK GOD FOR TIFF – THE IGNITION WIRE THAT GOES INTO THE SIDE OF THE DIZZY HAD COME OFF. SOON WE WERE AWAY AGAIN, WITH TIFF WARNING US VIA THE CB ABOUT ANY SPEED CAMERAS ETC ETC. AS WE TRAVELLED NORTH THE CLOUDS STARTED TO GATHER AND JUST SOUTH OF AVIEMORE THE HEAVENS OPENED. TIME FOR A QUICK ROOF STOP. WE PULLED IN AT A LAYBYE. TIFF JUMPED OUT AND PUT ON HIS ROOF, RICHARD JUMPED OUT AND PUT ON HIS ROOF, I PUT ON MY HAT.
FINALLY WE ARRIVED AT THE THOMSON HOUSE, AND WHILE NONE OF US HAD EVER BEEN THERE BEFORE WE KNEW WE HAD REACHED OUR BASE CAMP FOR THE NEXT 2 DAYS GOING BY THE PROMINENT SCATTERING OF ITALIAN CARS ON THE DRIVEWAY AND BY THE SPARE EXXIE ROOF SITTING BESIDE THE BACK DOOR. WE PITCHED LESLEY AND TIFFS TENT IN THE BACK GARDEN, AND HEADED INTO INVERNESS TO ALLOW RICHARD TO CHECK INTO HIS TRAVEL LODGE AND TO GRAB A BITE TO EAT. WE RETURNED TO BASE CAMP AFTER A SLIGHT UNINTENTIONAL DETOUR INTO THE CULLODEN COUNTRYSIDE AS THE MIST HAD WELL AND TRULY COME DOWN AND WE HAD TOTALLY LOST OUR BEARINGS FOR A WHILE – BLAME RICHARD, AS HE WAS LEADING THE WAY. THE REST OF THE EVENING WAS VERY HOSPITABLE, WITH A FEW ALES BEING CONSUMED AS WE ALL GOT SETTLED IN. THE ONLY PERSON THAT WAS MISSING WAS EWEN AS HE WAS WORKING LATE AND SO WOULD NOT ARRIVE UNTIL AT LEAST 1.30AM. OR SO WE THOUGHT. AT AROUND 12.20 WE HEARD A DISTINCT EXXIE RUMBLE AND SOON AFTER EWEN APPEARED CASUALLY MENTIONING WITH A NAUGHTY GRIN ON HIS FACE THAT HE HAD MADE GOOD TIME!
SATURDAY MORNING ARRIVED, AND AT THE BACK OF 10AM WE ALL SET OFF – 5 EXXIES AND ONE ALFA. HOWEVER, ALL WAS NOT WELL WITH OF ALL PEOPLE TIFF’S CAR – NO POWER AND LOTS OF EXCESS TEMPERATURE. WE PULLED IN TWICE ON THE A9 SOUTHBOUND – THE SECOND TIME LESLEY DOING A VERY PASSABLE IMPERSONATION OF A GAZELLE, JUMPING OUT AND AWAY FROM THE CAR AS IT GAVES OFF HUGE CLOUDS OF STEAM. A FEW MINUTES LATER, A TEA TOWEL, AN ENGINE BOOST BOX AND THE PROCUREMENT OF DINO THE DOGS WATER WE WERE READY TO LIMP ON TO TODAYS FIRST STOP – EXCEPT TIFFS ENGINE WAS SO TIGHT IT WOULD NOT TURN OVER RESULTING IN MUGGINS HERE PUSHING IT BACKWARDS DOWN THE A9 BY MYSELF TO HELP TIFF GET IT STARTED. THANKFULLY IT DID AND WE LIMPED TO TOMATIN WHERE WE MET UP WITH GRAEME (GRIMY) WHO HAD TRAVELLED OVER FROM ABERDEEN THAT MORNING. WHILE THERE TIFF ADJUSTED HIS TIMING, FILLED THE COOLING SYTEM, BLED THE RADIATOR AND THANKFULLY HIS CAR WAS FAULTLESS FOR THE REST OF THE WEEKEND AT THE SAME TIME RESTORING OUR FAITH IN ALL THINGS TIFF.
THE REST OF SATURDAY WAS SPENT DOING APPROX 120 MILES OF DRIVING AROUND THE SCOTTISH HIGHLANDS INCLUDING BOTH SIDES OF LOCH NESS (I THINK) AND WHILE IT WAS OVERCAST IT WAS THANKFULLY DRY. THE ROADS WERE TWISTY, QUICK., SINGLE TRACK IN PLACES AND WE EVEN DID A SMALL SECTION OF WHAT WAS A STAGE OF THE SCOTTISH RALLY CALLED THE CORKSCREW WHICH FOR ME AT LEAST WAS PRETTY CHALLENGING. THERE WAS PLENTY OF STOP OFFS FOR LUNCH AND REFRESHMENTS AND A FAIR FEW PHOTO OPPORTUNITIES. IN THE EVENING WE ENJOYED A BBQ AT BASE CAMP AND THE BOYS HAD A TECHNICAL SESSION IN IAN’S GARAGE LOOKING AT HIS 1300 SHELL WHICH HE HAS BEEN WORKING ON FOR SOME TIME NOW, NOT SURE WHAT DECADE HE STARTED THE RESTORATION – IT’S A CASE OF WORK IN PROGRESS AS THE PHOTOS SUGGEST.
SUNDAY MORNING DAWNED WITH THE SUN SPLITTING THE SKY - ‘SCORCHIO’ AS HUGH WOULD SAY. JUDITH MADE SOME SPLENDID BACON ROLLS AND SOON WE WERE OFF, HEADING NORTH AND THEN EAST ONTO THE BLACK ISLE TO DO A BIT OF WILD DOLPHIN WATCHING. A DOLPHIN DULY OBLIGED AND ALL THE PEOPLE WITH CAMERAS WASTED DOZENS OF PICTURES TRYING TO CAPTURE THE MOMENT WHEN THE DOLPHIN DEIGNED TO SURFACE. GARY MET US THERE IN HIS PRETTY MUCH PRISTINE METTALIC 1300 – A CAR WHICH OVER THE WEEKEND HAD CAUSED MUCH DEBATE AS TO WETHER THE PAINT WAS TWO PACK (I THOUGHT HE WAS A GANGSTER RAPPER) OR CELLULOSE ( AND I’M SURE THAT’S REALLY SOMETHING TO DO WITH MY WIFE’S LEGS). LEAVING THE BLACK ISLE BEHIND, WE RETURNED TO THE THOMSON HOUSE FOR YET MORE HOSPITALITY AND THEN HEADED SOUTH TO CATCH THE STEAM RAILWAY TRAIN FROM BOAT OF GARTEN TO AVIEMORE. WE COULD OF MADE IT, WE SHOULD OF MADE IT, BUT WE DIDN’T – SORRY JUDITH, NEXT TIME PERHAPS?
AFTER THAT IT WAS TIME TO GO OUR SEPARATE WAYS, WITH 4 CARS HEADING SOUTH IN CONVOY. THE CONVOY SPLIT IN TWO AT PERTH, ONE GOING S/EAST, THE OTHER S/WEST. I PERSONALLY GOT HOME AT 6.30PM HAVING ENJOYED A FANTASTIC WEEKEND IN WHICH MY CAR HAD COVERED APPROX 600 MILES. THE FACT THAT IT STARTED TO RAIN HEAVILY ABOUT 15 MINUTES LATER MADE IT ALL THE SWEETER.
IN SUMMARY:-
A HIGHLAND WEEKEND IS A FANTASTIC EVENT AND NOT TO BE MISSED
IT ACTUALLY CAN BE SUNNY AND DRY IN SCOTLAND
JUDITH AND IAN ARE VERY GENEROUS HOSTS AND I THANK YOU BOTH FOR LITERALLY PROVIDING TWO ROOFS OVER MY HEAD AND FOR ORGANISING A MOST MEMORABLE EVENT
THE TIFF STILL HAS THE OLD MAGIC
AND FINALLY I CAN CONFIRM THAT EWEN BROWN DOES NOT SNORE.
